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Thread: HR Policy: Effective FY2007.........

  1. #1
    Lina
    Guest

    HR Policy: Effective FY2007.........

    Dear All,
    >
    > HR Policy: Effective FY2007
    >
    > Dress Code
    >
    > It is advised that you come to work dressed according to your salary. If
    > we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci HOOCHI bag, we assume you
    > are doing well financially and therefore do not need a raise. If you dress
    > poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you buy
    > nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need a raise. If you dress just right,
    > you are right where you need to be and therefore you do not need a raise.
    >
    > Sick Days
    >
    > We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness. If you
    > are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
    >
    > Annual Leave Days
    >
    > Each employee will receive 104 Annual Leave days a year. They are called
    > Saturday and Sunday.
    >
    > Toilet Use
    >
    > Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict
    > three-minute time limit in the stalls. At the end of three minutes, an
    > alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open,
    > and a picture will be taken. After your second offence, your picture will
    > be posted on the company bulletin board under the chronic offenders category.
    > Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sanctioned under the
    > company's mental health policy.
    >
    > Lunch Break
    >
    > Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need to eat more, so that
    > they can look healthy. Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get
    > a balanced meal to maintain their average figure. Chubby people get 5
    > minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drink a Slim-Fast
    >
    > Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide a
    > positive employment experience.
    >
    > Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations,
    > irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations,
    > contemplation's, consternation and input should be directed elsewhere.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > The Management
    > "It Can Only Get Better!"


     



  2. #2
    coolestnapster
    Guest
    lina don't kill me but is a re.....and don't dare to say sorry or i will kill u...lolz

  3. #3
    Kaleem
    Guest
    nice n interesting

    keep it up dear


    be happy

  4. #4
    Lina
    Guest
    kaleem cheers yaar.............& sunny cheers to u also..............bye take care

  5. #5
    Kaleem
    Guest
    cheers

  6. #6
    D_only_one
    Guest
    nice one lina.. cheers.. (But wheres the drink)

  7. #7
    beng072488
    Guest
    LOL

  8. #8
    54321
    Guest
    nice

  9. #9
    Terminator
    Guest
    nice post lina.

  10. #10
    shalin_99
    Guest
    gr8...

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