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Thread: Airlines Humor

  1. #1

    Airlines Humor

    Lufthansa Airlines

    Passengers on a Lufthansa flight heard this announcement from the
    captain:"Ladies and Gentlemen, I am sorry to inform you that we have
    lost power to all of our engines and will shortly crash into the ocean".

    The passengers were obviously very worried about this situation but were
    somewhat comforted by the captain's next announcement.

    "Ladies and Gentlemen, we at Lufthansa have prepared for such an
    emergency and we would now like you to rearrange your seating so that
    all the non-swimmers are on the left side of the plane and all the
    swimmers are on the right side of the plane.

    After this announcement all the passengers rearranged their seating to
    comply with the captain's request.


    Two minutes later the captain made a belly landing in the ocean. The
    captain once again made an announcement:

    "Ladies and Gentlemen we have crashed into the ocean. All of the
    swimmers on the right side of the plane open your emergency exits and
    quickly swim away from the plane.

    For all of the non-swimmers on the left side of plane... -Thank You for
    Flying Lufthansa- ".

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    Delta Airlines

    At the airport for a trip, I settled down to wait for the boarding
    announcement at Gate 35. Then I heard the voice on the public address
    system saying,

    "We apologize for the inconvenience, but Delta Flight 570 will board
    from Gate 41."

    So my family picked up our luggage and carried it over to Gate 41.

    Not ten minutes later the public address voice told us that Flight 570
    would in fact be boarding from Gate 35. So again we gathered our
    carry-on luggage and returned to the original gate.

    Just as we were settling down, the public address voice spoke "Thank You
    for participating in Delta's physical fitness program."

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    British Airways

    "This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I'd like to
    welcome you aboard British Airways flight 602 from New York to London .

    We are currently flying at a height of 35,000 feet midway across the

    "If you look out of the windows on the starboard side of the aircraft,
    you will observe that both the starboard engines are on fire.

    "If you look out of the windows on the port side, you will observe that
    the port wing has fallen off."

    "If you look down towards the Atlantic Ocean , you will see a little
    yellow life raft with three people in it waving at you. That's me your
    captain, the co-pilot, and one of the air stewardesses. This is a
    recorded message."

  2. #2
    Member Array jojo_patty's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Country: Sri Lanka
    Rep Power
    Hahahaha Good Ones!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks Deepthi


  3. #3

  4. #4
    wat is "LOL"?

  5. #5
    laugh out loud

  6. #6
    lol = laughing out loudly or laugh out loud.

  7. #7

  8. #8
    thanks to everyone

  9. #9
    welcome am_alive

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