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Thread: -=[Hilarious Court Cases]=-

  1. #1






    darani is offline
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    -=[Hilarious Court Cases]=-

    These are from a book called "Disorder in the Court." These are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters - who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

    Q: What is your date of birth?
    A: July fifteenth.
    Q: What year?
    A: Every year.
    --------------------------------------

    Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
    A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
    Q: And why did that upset you?
    A: My name is Susan.
    --------------------------------------

    Q: And where was the location of the accident?
    A: Approximately milepost 499.
    Q: And where is milepost 499?
    A: Probably between milepost 498 and 500.
    --------------------------------------

    Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
    --------------------------------------

    Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
    --------------------------------------

    Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
    A: Yes.
    Q: And what were you doing at that time?
    --------------------------------------

    Q: She had three children, right?
    A: Yes.
    Q: How many were boys?
    A: None.
    Q: Were there any girls?
    --------------------------------------

    Q: You say the stairs went down to the basement?
    A: Yes.
    Q: And these stairs, did they go up! Also?
    --------------------------------------

    Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
    A: By death.
    Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
    --------------------------------------

    Q: Can you describe the individual?
    A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
    Q: Was this a male or a female?
    -------------------------------------

    Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
    A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
    --------------------------------------

    Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
    A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
    Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
    A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.
    --------------------------------------

    Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
    A: No.
    Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
    A: No.
    Q: Did you check for breathing?
    A: No.
    Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
    A: No.
    Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
    A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
    Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
    A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.
    --------------------------------------












  2. #2
    Maha
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    soooooooooooo funny



  3. #3
    shakeel
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    maha tum her waqt hansti rehti ho jokes perh perh k



  4. #4
    muralidharan
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    its so nice and funny



  5. #5
    Member Array jojo_patty's Avatar
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    Hahahaha Nice One Darani!!!!



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    hi frnds...

    thnx for ur replies....


    have a gr8 day
    bye tc



  7. #7
    coolestnapster
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    i liked the last one...i mean its much more funny then the rest of the lot



  8. #8
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    hi frnd...

    thnx for ur reply...

    have a gr8 day
    bye tc



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