Q. What is the best day to go to the beach?
A. Sunday, of course!
Q. What bow can't be tied?
A. A rainbow!
Q. What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish?
A. Every morning you'll rise and shine!
Q. What does a teddy bear put in his house?
Q.What season is it when you are on a trampoline?
Q. What happens to cows during an earthquake?
A. They give milk shakes!
Q. Why did the jelly wobble?
A. Because it saw the milk shake!
Q. What do you call a girl who is always in the bookies?
Q. Where do cows go on holiday?
A. Moo York
Q. Where did the computer go to dance?
A. To a disc-o.
Q. What do you call a man who rolls in the leaves?
Q. What has one head, one foot and four legs?
A. A Bed
Q. Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
A. He was a chicken.
Q. What is the difference between a school teacher and a train?
A. The teacher says spit your gum out and the train says "chew chew chew".
Q. Why did the birdie go to the hospital?
A. To get a tweetment.
Q. What do you call someone who is afraid of Santa?
A. A Clausterphobic
Q. Why was the guy looking for the food on his friend?
A. Because his friend said its on me.
Q. Did you hear the joke about the roof?
A. Never mind, it's over your head!
Q. What do you call a cow eating grass in a paddock?
A. A lawn mooer
Q. Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
A. Because he had no-body to go with.