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Thread: Divorce Letter

  1. #1


    Divorce Letter

    Dear Wife:

    I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you
    forever. I've been a good man to you for seven years and I have
    nothing to show for it.

    These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me
    that you quit your job today and that was the last straw.

    Last week, you came home and didn't even notice that I had a new
    haircut, had cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new
    pair of silk boxers. You ate in two minutes, and went straight to
    sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell me you love
    me anymore; you don't want sex or anything that connects us as
    husband and wife.

    Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me anymore; whatever
    the case, I'm gone.

    Your EX-Husband

    P.S . Don't try to find me. Your SISTER and I are moving away
    to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

    Dear Ex-Husband -

    Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's
    true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a
    good man is a far cry from what you've been.

    I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant
    whining and griping. Too bad that doesn't work.

    I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the first thing
    that came to mind was 'You look just like a girl!' Since my mother
    raised me not to say anything if you can't say something nice, I
    didn't comment.

    And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me
    confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.

    About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the
    $49.99 price tag was still on them, and I prayed that it was a
    coincidence that my sister had just borrowed fifty dollars from me
    that morning.

    After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it
    out. So when I hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job
    and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were
    gone. Everything happens for a reason, I guess.

    I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer
    said that the letter you wrote ensures you won't get a dime from me.
    So take care.


    Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell and Free!

  2. #2
    Member Array jojo_patty's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Country: Sri Lanka
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    Awww Man that was awesome Thanks Deepthi

  3. #3
    kool one deepthi .....r u looking for such a husband...lolz just kidding

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