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Thread: Laugh a Bit

  1. #1

    Laugh a Bit


    Sardar to his servant: Go and water the plants.
    Servant: It's already raining.
    Sardar: So what take an umbrella and go.

    Sardar found the answer to the most difficult question ever -
    What will come first, Chicken or egg?
    O Yaar, what ever U order first, will come first.


    A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match. All were busy writing except one Sardarji.
    He wrote "DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!"

    Postman: - I Have To Come 5 Miles to Deliver U This Packet
    Sardar: - why did U come so far. Instead U could Have posted it....

    A Sardar & his wife filed an application for Divorce.
    Judge asked: How'll U divide your kids, U"VE 3 children?
    Sardar replied: Ok! We'll apply NEXT YEAR

    Sardar's wish: when I die, I wana die like my Grandpa who died peacefully in his sleep not Screaming like all d passengers in d car he was Driving..

    A Teacher lecturing on population:

    "In Indi a after every 10 secs a women gives birth to a kid. "
    A Sardar stands up- "We must find & stop her!. "

    A man: "Sardarji, tell me, why Manmohan Singh goes for a walk in the evening not in the morning?"

    Sardarji: ''Arey bhai Manmohan is PM not AM''.

    Sardar visits Chinese friend dying in hospital.
    The Chinese friend just says "CHIN YU YAN" and dies.
    Sardarji goes to China to find the meaning of his friend's last Words.
    And finds It means "U R STANDNG ON the OXYGEN TUBE!"

    Sardarji was standing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed.
    His wife asked what you are doing.
    He said-I am seeing how I look while sleeping.

    Why did Sardar cut the sides of the capsule before taking it?

    Guess what...
    To avoid side effects!!!

    Man: Sardarji where were U born?
    Sardarji: Punjab .
    Man: Which part?
    Sardar: Oye part part kya kar raha hai, whole body Is born in Punjab Yaar".

    Lawyer to Sardar: "Gita pe haath rakhkar kaho ke...... "
    Sardar :"Yeh kya, Sita pe haath lagaya to court mein Bulaya. Ab fir Gita pe haath!!"

    Sardar: For the past one week a girl is disturbing Me.
    I don't know how she got my no, she interrupts whenever I call someone and says "please recharge your card"

    A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a Sardarni painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket. Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall.
    She showed him the instructions on the tin, "For Best Results put on Two Coats"

    A sardar was drawing money from ATM,

    The sardar behind him in the line said, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! I've seen ur password. Its 4 asterisks (****). "
    The first sardar replies, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! U R wrong, Its 1258"

    Q How do U recognize a sardar in school or College???
    A They are the ones who erase their notebooks when the teacher erases the blackboard... BOLO tarara!!

    Q Why did the sardarji sleep with a scale?
    A Because he wanted to measure how long he has Slept........

    Santa Singh MBBS
    After finishing his MBBS, Dr. Santa Singh starts his Own practice.
    He checked his first patient's Eyes, then the tongue, and finally the Ears using a torch.
    Finally he said Battery is Ok !!!


  2. #2
    beautiful all of them.
    really nice post dear...

    do post more.

  3. #3
    One of the best interviews!!!
    Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.

    Candidate: I am Rameshwar Kulkarni. I did my Tele Communication engineering from BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology.

    Interviewer: BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology? I had never heard of this college before!

    Candidate: Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an admission into it ..
    What happened is - due to cricket world cup I scored badly! in 12th.I was getting a paid seat in a good college. But my father said (I prefer to call him 'baap') - "I can not invest so much of money".(The baap actually said - "I will never waste so much of money on you"). So I had to join this college. Frankly
    speaking this name - BabanRao Dhole-Patil, can at the most be related to a Shetakari Mahavidyalaya.

    Interviewer: ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your engineering.

    Candidate: Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years. But you know, these cricket matches and football world cup, and tennis tournaments. It is difficult to concentrate. So I flunked in 2nd and 3rd year. So in all I took 4 + 2 = 7 years.

    Interviewer: But 4+2 is 6.

    Candidate: Oh, is it? You know I always had KT in maths. But I will try to keep this in mind. 4+2 is 6, good, thanks. These cricket matches really affect exams a lot. I think they should ban it.

    Interviewer: Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.

    Candidate: No, no... I am talking about Exams!!

    Interviewer: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life?

    Candidate: Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought I would complete it. In fact, when i flunked in 3rd year, she was looking for a job for me in BEST (Bus corporation in Maharashtra) through some relative.

    Interviewer: Do you have any plans of higher study?

    Candidate: he he he.. Are you kidding? Completing 'lower' education itself was so much of pain!!

    Interviewer: Let's talk about technical stuff. On which platforms have you worked?

    Candidate: Well, I work at SEEPZ, so you can say Andheri is my current platform. Earlier I was at Vashi center. So Vashi was my platform then. As you can see I have experience of different platforms! (Vashi and Andheri are the places in Mumbai)

    Interviewer: And which languages have you used?

    Candidate: Marathi, Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in German, French, Russian and many other languages.

    Interviewer: Why VC is better than VB?

    Candidate: It is a common sense - C comes after B. So VC is a higher version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new language VD!

    Interviewer: Do you know anything about Assembly Language?

    Candidate: Well, I have not heard of it. But I guess, this is the language our ministers and MPs use in assembly.

    Interviewer: What is your general project experience?

    Candidate: My general experience about projects is - most of th! e times they are in pipeline!

    Interviewer: Can you tell me about your current job?

    Candidate: Sure, Currently I am working for Bata InfoTech ltd. Since joining BIL, I am on Bench. Before joining BIL, I used to think that Bench was another software like Windows.

    Interviewer: Do you have any project management experience?

    Candidate: No, but I gues! s it shouldn't be difficult. I know Word and Excel. I can talk a lot. I know how to dial for International phone call and use speaker facility. And very important - I know few words like - 'Showstoppers ' , 'hotfixes', 'SEI-CMM','quality','versioncontrol','deadlines' , 'Customer Satisfaction' etc. Also I can blame others for my

    Interviewer: What are your expectations from our company?

    Candidate: Not much.
    1. I should at least get 40,000 in hand.
    2. I would like to work on a live EJB project. But it should not have deadlines. I personally feel that pressure affects natural talent.
    3. I believe in flexi-timings.
    4. Dress code is against basic freedom, so I would like to wear t-shirt and jeans.
    5. We must have sat-sun off. I will suggest Wednesday off also, so as to avoid breakdown due to overwork.
    6. I would like to go abroad 3 times a year on short term preferably 1-2 months) assignments. Personally I prefer US, Australia and Europe. But considering the fact that there is a world cup in West Indies in 2007, I don't mind going there in that period. As you can see I am modest and don't have many expectations. So can I assume my selection?

    Interviewer: he he he ha ha ha. Thanks for your interest in our organization. In fact I was never entertained so much before. Welcome to INFOSYS .

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