Once there were twins,
Joe and John.
Joe was the owner of a dilapidated old boat.
It so happened that John's wife died
A few days later, a kindly old woman saw Joe and mistook him for John.

She said, "I'm sorry to hear about your loss.
You must just feel terrible."

Joe, thinking that she was talking about his boat, said,
"Heck no, fact is I'm sort of glad to be rid of her.
Her bottom was all shrivelled up
and she smelled like old dead fish.

She was always losing her water,
she had a bad crack in the back
Every time I used her, her hole got bigger

I guess what finally finished her off
was when I rented her to these
four guys looking for a good time.I warned them that she wasn't very good,

The fools tried to get in her all at once and
she split
right up the middle."
The old lady fainted.