INTERESTING ONE LINERS BUT NOT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY:
· I say no to alcohol, it just doesn't listen.
· A friend in need is a pest indeed.
· Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.
· Work is fine if it doesn't take too much of your time.
· When everything comes in your way you're in the wrong lane.
· The light at the end of the tunnel may be an incoming train..
· Born free, taxed to death.
· Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.
· Life is unsure; always eat your dessert first.
· Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.
· If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you'll have trouble putting on your pants.
· It's not hard to meet expenses, they are everywhere.
· I love being a writer... what I can't stand is the paperwork..
· A printer consists of 3 main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light.
· The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was the genius.
· The trouble with being punctual is that no one is there to appreciate it.
· In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?
· If you cannot change your mind, are you sure you have one?
· Beat the 5 O'clock rush, leave work at noon!
· If you can't convince them, confuse them.
· It's not the fall that kills you. It's the sudden stop at the end.
· I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
· Hot glass looks same as cold glass. - Cunino's Law of Burnt Fingers
· The cigarette does the smoking you are just the sucker.
· Someday is not a day of the week
· Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.
· The road to success.... Is always under construction.
· Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again, neither does Milk.
· In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you don't need it