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Thread: One-Liners2

  1. #1
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    One-Liners2



    Angry Santa to his son: Have you ever seen an owl?
    Pappu: (Luking down) No...
    Santa: Don't look down. Look at me.




    Santa: Do you want to hear a dirty joke?
    Banta: Ok
    Santa: A white horse fell in the mud.




    Two goldfish in a bowl talking: Goldfish 1: Do you believe in God?
    Goldfish 2: Of course, I do! Who do you think changes the water?





     


    Postman: I have to come 5 miles to deliver u this packet.
    Santa: Why did u come so far. Instead U could have posted it.




    Why women live a better, longer & a peaceful life?
    Because, women don't have a wife.




    Man standing on the scale, holding his stomach in. Wife: I don't think that is going to help.
    Man: Sure it does. How else could I see the numbers?




    Maths & Women are the two most complicated things in this world...
    But maths at least has some logic!




    Teacher: what do u call a person who cannot hear anything?
    Santa: U can call him anything, because he cannot hear anything.




    Santa found the answer to the most difficult question ever: What will come first, Chicken or egg?
    O Yaar, what ever U order first, will come first.




    Why do bees hum?
    Because they've forgotten the words.



    Control to pilot: What is your height and position?
    Pilot: I'm five feet eight inches and i'm sitting down.




    Wife: I Have Changed My Mind.
    Husband: Thank God ! Does The New One Work Now?




    A boy goes to a strip club. His mom gets angry & asks him: Did u see anything there that u were not supposed to see?
    Boy: Yes, I saw dad!




    Aftr robbing d Bank, robber 2 clerk: Did u see me robbing?
    Clerk: Yes.
    Robber shot him dead & asked d next clerk: Did u?
    2nd clerk: No, But my wife saw u!




    Why are Egyptian Children always confused?
    Because after death, their DADDY becomes a MUMMY.




    Two men were talking. First: I got married coz I was tired of eating out, cleaning the house n doing laundry.
    Second: Amazing, I took divorce for the same reason!




    Teacher: Who is Mahatma Gandhi?
    Modern day Student: He is the one who helped Munna Bhai to impress his Girlfriend!




    It's a fact: A girl may not help u to get lot of salary but... salary may help u to get lot of girls. So, love ur work not girls!




    One of the biggest problems of the world is that the stupid ones are damn sure & the intelligent ones are full of doubts !




    When gambling became legal in the city, everyone agreed that the city was now a bettor place.






  2. #2
    Senior Member Array sunnyajmal's Avatar
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    hahahah....very nice so how abt u? i think u r sure...

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    abt what?

  4. #4
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    nice colllection............but I didnt get this


    Man standing on the scale, holding his stomach in. Wife: I don't think that is going to help.
    Man: Sure it does. How else could I see the numbers?

  5. #5
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    i think k us ka belly bohat bara tha is liye..... what do u say now?

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