A man who had been called to testify at the Income Tax Department
asked his accountant for advice on what to wear. "Wear your shabbiest
clothing. Let him think you are a pauper," the accountant replied.

Then he asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite
advice. "Don't let them intimidate you. Wear your most elegant suit and tie."

Confused, the man went to his priest, told him of the conflicting
advice, and requested some resolution on the dilemma.

"Let me tell you a story," replied the priest. "A woman, about to be
married, asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. 'Wear a
heavy, long, flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck.'
But when she asked her best friend, she got conflicting advice. 'Wear
your most revealing negligee, a nice V-neck.' "

Confused, the man asked, "What does all this have to do with my
problem with the Income Tax Department?"

"Simple," replied the Priest. "It doesn't matter what you wear,
you're gonna get screwed anyway."