Marriages are made in heaven

, then what are made in Hell?
Ans : the days after marriage



During Marriage ceremony why is the bridegroom is made to sit on the horse ?
He is given his last chance to run away.




I wrote ur name on the sand ............ .
it got washed away,
I wrote ur name in air......... .......... ........
it got blown away,
So i wrote ur name in my heart....... ......
I got a HEART ATTACK



LOVE is like a CIGAR
It starts with a fire..... continues with smoke.....and ends in ashes...
But dont worry - we are chain smokers



ur smile can be compared to a flower
ur voice can be compared to a cuckoo
ur inocence to a child
but in stupidity
u have no comparison
u r the best



True love is like a pillow
u can hug when u r in trouble
u can cry on when u r in pain & u can embrace when u r happy
so when u need true love
spend Rs.50/-Buy a pillow




Dear Friend,

when i ask u flower,
u give me bouquet
when i ask u a stone
u give me a statue
when i ask u a feather
u give me peacock

ARE U REALLY DEAF ?




I had VODKA with WATER
I felt DRUNK
I had WHISKY with WATER
I felt DRUNK
I had RUM with WATER
I felt DRUNK
I SWEAR I'LL NEVER DRINK water....!!!




Teacher : four beautiful ladies r walking on the road. change it to exclamatory sentence ..
Student : WOW !



The human brain is most outstanding thing.......
it functions 24hrs 365 days.....
it functions right from the time u r Born.... until you fall in love


 





SMILE - is a language of love
SMILE - is a source to win hearts...
SMILE - creates greatness in ur personality
SO....
Brush ur Teeth today onwards




A cigarette shortens your life by 2 min..
A beer shortens your life by 4 min..
A working day shortens your life by 8 hours!!!!...




History Teacher : From where to where did the mughals rule ?
Student : sir, i am not sure but think from page 15 to 26 sir....



Teacher : U failure ! @ ur age Bill gates stood first in the class
Student : Mind u, Sir, but @ ur age hitler commited suicide