Kidnapping by a sardar... TOO GOOD!
There was a Sardarji who was down on his luck.
In order to raise some money he decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. He went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree and told him, "I've kidnapped you."
Sardarji then wrote a note saying: "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put Rs.2, 00,000 in a paper bag and put it beneath the mango tree on the north side of the city playground".
Signed: "A Sardarji"
Sardarji then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the Sardarji checked, and sure enough a paper bag was kept beneath the mango tree.
The boy was sitting next to the bag. Sardarji opened up the bag and found the Rs.2, 00,000 in cash with a note saying: "How can a sardarji do this to a fellow Sardarji? Take the money, and please leave my son."
Signed: Another Sardarji
Two Sardarjis, both student of I.I.T, Kanpur, were talking about the American Astronauts.
One said to the other, "What's the big deal about going to the moon-anybody can go to the moon. We are sardars we will go direct to the sun."
"But if we get within 13 million miles from the sun, we'll melt."
And the first answered, "So what, we'll go at night."
A sardarji with two red ears went to his doctor. The doctor asked him what had happened to his ears and he answered, "I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang - but instead of picking up the phone I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear."
"Oh Dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But .. what happened to your other ear?"
"The scoundrel called back."
A sardarji Doctor falls in Love with a Nurse.He writes a love letter to the Nurse :- I Love U sister....
Question: What is the truest definition of Globalization?
Answer: Princess Diana's death.
Question: How come?
Answer: An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel, driving a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was drunk on Scottish whisky, (check the bottle before you change the spelling) followed closely by Italian Paparazzi, on Japanese motorcycles; treated by an American doctor, using Brazilian medicines. This is sent to you by an American, using Bill Gates's technology, and you're probably reading this on your computer, that use Taiwanese chips, and a Korean monitor, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant, transported by Indian lorry-drivers, hijacked by Indonesians, unloaded by Sicilian longshoremen, and trucked to you by Mexican illegals.
That, my friends, is Globalization!!
A teacher was asking her class: "What is the difference between 'unlawful'
and 'illegal'?" Only one hand shot up.
"Ok, answer,Joan" said the teacher.
"'unlawful' is when you do something the law doesn't allow and 'illegal' is a
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Tech support: what kind of computer do you have?
Female customer : a white One
When I open my eyes every morning,
I pray to God that everyone should have a friend like you....
Why should only I suffer!!!
SANTA & HIS WIFE GOING 2 CITY IN AUTO....
DRIVER ADJUSTED MIRROR..
SANTA SHOUTED U R SEEING MY WIFE...
GO & SIT BACK I WILL DRIVE THE AUTO...
SLAM BOOK filled by Santa.
3.Oppurtunity:When Banta is on tour.
4.Threat:When I am on tour
Electricity: A call from ladies hostel at night to electricity office
" we lost the power send your men"
" No Man here, Use Candles"
Santa Singh is called for an interview in some firm. He lands there
on time. He is immediately hauled inside in front of the
interviewing officer. Officer looks at Santa singh Then goes thru his
certificates and then starts asking him questions.
Following is the transcript :
O : Mr. Santa Singh, after seeing your qualifications & credentials
I would like to ask you only some simple questions. If you can
answer those then you are selected. First we will start with some
S : Yes Sir.
Officer started asking questions
O : Above
S : Below
O : Front
S : Back
O : Left
S : Right
O : Male
S : Female
O : Ugly (means Next in Punjabi)
S : Pichhly (means Previous in Punjabi)
O : Ugly...U-G-L-Y( Officer spells it)
S : Pichhly...P-I-C-H-H-L-Y( Our sardar also spells it)
O : U.....G.....L ...... Y.....(Officer shouts)
S : P ..... I ..... C ..... H ....... H ...... L ..... Y......
Our sardar also shouts)
#Officer is now angry.
O : Get out
S : Come in.
O : Quiet please.
S : Talk please.
O : You are rejected.
S : I am selected ........ ....... and This is how Santa Singh got
One sardu was going to Chandigarh from pune by a air-india plane.He was alloted the middle seat of one of the 3-seats array. But as soon as the sardarji got into the plane, he sat on the window side seat which was actually for an old lady.After some time the old lady came and requested the sardarji to leave the side seat.But the sardaji told:"I want to see the view from the window and shall not leave". The old lady then complained to the air hostess .The air hostess came and requested the sardarji to leave that seat.But sardarji was adament and did not leave.Then the air hostess went and told the asst capt.He also came and requested,but in vain.
Finally the Captain came.He whispered something in the ears of the sardarji,and the sardarji immedietly left the side seat and returned to the middle seat. Astonished,the airhostess and the asst. capt. asked the capt afterwards what he told to the sardarji.Capt. told :"nothing.Ijust told him that only the middle seats will go to Chandigarh. All others will go to Jalandhar."
The man approached a very beautiful woman in a large supermarket and
asked,"You know, I've lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you
talk to me for a couple of minutes?"
"Why?" she asks.
"Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman, my wife appears out
Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her
mother, "Why is the bride dressed in white?"
"Because white is the color of happiness and today is the happiest day
of her life." Her mother tried to explain, keeping it simple.
The child thought about this for a moment,then said, "So, why is the
groom wearing black?"